Steaming Turkey with a side of Yellowed Sausage and Almond Paste

Holy shit that’s a lotta leftovers. What, ya can’t do math? Stupid turkey math fucked you up. Well, I guess you gotta look on the bright side and do something useful with your life, FOR ONCE! So make this, and serve it up in that dumbshit bowl you made in bowl class. Your mom’ll be real proud, but prolly not.

  • Whatever’s left of the turkey, which is prob’ly a lot, knowing how you like to waste things like the world is your personal toilet
  • Bucket of Organic Yellow
  • Snausages-BRAND Dog Food
  • Dirty Hippie Coop-BRAND DIY De-Snausagizing Sausage-Treat Maker, Gel
  • Almond Milk
  • Solid Day!-BRAND Solidizing Agent, in the Produce Section
  • “Love,” I guess, cuz we’re a co-op and we’re supposed to say that or else you’ll start to suspect the truth about corporate takeovers organic love.

Start with the almond paste, since that takes the longest. Mix one-pound almond milk to one-pound solidizing agent until large and in charge. You’ll know what we mean when it happens. And you’ll know when it’s done. Trust us.

Meanwhile, follow Snausages Yahoo Group instructions to sausafy snausages.

Puree turkey. Whoops! Don’t. Too late, numbnuts, looked like you fucked up another goddamn thing in your worthless life.

Maybe you can like try harder next time, asshole.

P.S. Sprinkle on the “love.”

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